Up My Own Ass

First off, I like boobs… big fan of the things. You can’t cut anything with them, peel vegatables or really even use them to hold anything, but if you’ve ever gotten a chance to spend time with them, they just seem smart.

Honestly I meet very few people that dislike boobs. Men and women alike seem to be pretty taken with them.

Men like them because there isn’t any problem they don’t solve, and women are enamored with them out of a sense of due-dilligence on their part… sorta like Wal-Mart keeping on eye on Costco; gotta know what your competition is doing.

This mostly universal agreement that the population of earth has with the cosmos (that boobs are awesome) has led a lot of women to the conclusion: “If boobs are awesome, more boobs are more awesomer!”

That’s really not the case here folks.

If you enjoyed masterbating once a week because it relaxed you, that’s not to say that giving it a go for atleast 3hrs every day is going to be better. All your going to accomplish is an emergency room visit and doctors order to leave “the little guy the hell alone for a while”.

Above we have Nereida Gallardo, by all accounts an attractive woman with giant headlights. From the looks of it though, things are a little out of whack if you know what I mean. Nereida went the fake-boobs route, and now she has a couple of chest-buddies that look like they are drunk.

Another example of someone who went the “Crippling back pain is HILARIOUS” route was Katie Price. The down side there is that she has some horrible nipple-scars as a result of the huge-ectomy/boob-ectomy (I couldn’t decide which one I liked more).

That concludes this week’s PSA. Next week we will cover: “Boobs… man’s new best friend?” and the week after we have “How to meet more boobs using working lunches!”

… I should probably win a Nobel Peace Prize now…