Up My Own Ass

While visiting 1-800-Flowers.com today, I was surprised, as I’m sure you’ll be as well, to discover that it today is Ex-Day.

What is Ex-Day? Let’s see what 1-800-Flowers.com says:

Inspired by CBS’ new series, THE EX LIST, “Ex Day” on October 16th is the perfect day to reconnect with your “Ex” and who knows…sparks could fly again! And what better way to surprise them than with this fabulous bouquet of fresh green and white flowers!

This is so wrong on so many levels, I don’t even know where to begin…

• Inspired by CBS? Yay for holidays backed by mega-corporations
• Ex-Day? Yay for having sex with someone that either you can’t stand, or can’t stand you. Hey, you idiots did break up, right?
• Sparks could fly again?  Yea, sure CBS, we know what the subtext is here.

Don’t forget, your partner may have contracted an STD since the last time you guys flew sparks together; maybe the tagline should be: “Crabs could fly again?!”. Too bad the flowers don’t come with condoms.

Happy Have-Sex-With-Your-Ex-Day!