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Tag Archive | "parenting"

Please Don’t Litter!!!!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

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Honestly, I blame the McCaugheys.  You remember… Kenny and Bobbi McCaughey and their septuplets.  Fucking SEPTUPLETS. The drill is always the same.  “We couldn’t have babies, so we prayed about it and God blessed us with all these wonderful babies and promised to take care of all of us!!!” My question is this:  Why weren’t you listening [...]

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What Goes Up, Must Come Down - Life’s Embarassing Moments

Saturday, November 1, 2008

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Now that we are all coming down off of the Halloween induced sugar high, we are officially entering the season to be thankful.  Thankful we haven’t been foreclosed on.  Thankful that our bank did not go tits-up under the cloak of night, swallowing our entire life savings.  Thankful that this Goddamn election will be OVER [...]

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From the Brilliant Parenting Files… File #3

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

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The first line of the story says it all: STEVENSVILLE, Montana (AP) — About 90 elementary school students in Montana have started a series of rabies shots after a parent let them touch a dead bat that was later confirmed to be diseased. But really, to get the full effect, you have to keep reading: The mother of [...]

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Gag Me with a SPOON!

Saturday, October 4, 2008

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Here is a fantastic little bipartisan tale that everyone can enjoy. I hate vomit.  I doubt there is anyone reading this that says, “Not ME, I LOVE IT!!!” But I REALLY hate it. Unfortunately, one of the risks of having children is that they will erupt like Mt. Vasuvius at the drop of a hat.  Generally speaking, that [...]

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From the “Brilliant Parenting” files… File #2

Friday, September 26, 2008

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Wow parenting just gets better and better these days! Now, if you make a mistake - or nine of them - Nebraskan law says you can just click “cancel” and call it a day! I can see it: Hi honey, how was your day? Fine snookums. I got tired of changing diapers for Billy, Samantha was giving [...]

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From the “Brilliant Parenting” files…

Thursday, September 25, 2008

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I’ll never understand why we have to pass tests to get past first grade, get a driver’s license, or get into eharmony.com, but to bring a child (or twenty) into the world? Nothin. We live in a world of creating stockpiles of band-aids to fix our severed limbs as a society. What ever happened to “an [...]

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Bringing Your Baby to a Theater Makes me Wish You Were Sterile

Sunday, July 20, 2008

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Have you had the joy of this happening to you as well? You’ve had a long week, you finally decided to go see the new hot movie opening weekend so you get off work, rush home, collect your significant other and rush off to the theater where you pay $20 for tickets and another $317 for [...]

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