Up My Own Ass

Jim Rice Finally Gets in Hall; Thanks, You Bastards!

After 15 years of traveling to Cooperstown every January and throwing eggs, fecal matter, and bits of the dried-up bones of Bill Mazeroski at the Major League Baseball Hall of Fame, the goofy, know-it-all American sportswriters finally voted Boston Red Sox legend, and my childhood hero, Jim Rice into its stupid sacred doors. To bring this [...]

Continue reading...

Boo-Ray for Tampa

So, the Tampa Bay Rays are in the World Series playing the Philadelphia Phillies. The stars and planets have aligned perfectly as Cinderella lifts her skirt and gives Prince Charming the go-ahead wink… and this Red Sox fan is sick to his stomach. This morning I passed a store on the way to work called “Upton Repairs”.  My heart sank [...]

Continue reading...

Are You Pregnant Ref? Cause You Missed the Last 2 Periods!

Next time you are at a Hockey, Football, Soccer, whatever-game, maybe consider making yourself one of these just incase you get frustrated?

Continue reading...

Sox Fans Say “Hell, no!” to DiMaggio

On a rainy weekend, possibly just weeks, perhaps days before his death, the Boston Red Sox finally decided to retire Johnny Pesky’s number. Ole Numero Six was a member of the organization off and on, in one way or another, for about 150 years. The team even named a foul pole in Fenway Park [...]

Continue reading...

Yankee Stadium dies, and the Heavens chant ‘Yankees Suck!’

Retired Yankees from far and wide stormed Yankee Stadium with crowbars Sunday night to grab a li’l piece of the House That Ruth Built only seconds before bulldozers knocked the place down, killing everyone instantly. Suddenly all of Ruth Buzzi’s work, constructing ole YS brick by brick back in 1782, was for not. And soon all [...]

Continue reading...

Ocho Stinko!

The biggest story entering the 2008 NFL season has been Brett Favre being a big pain is the ass with his, “I’m retiring. No I’m not,” business in Green Bay. Now the crybaby is with the Jets, like stars Joe Namath and Riff from West Side Story before him. Great. Good luck, stupid. Here’s hoping [...]

Continue reading...